I've had so many emails asking for the characteristics of a gifted child that I posted on the Today show segment last week. Truly gifted kids are different. To date, there is no single agreed-upon definition. What is agreed is that high intelligence exists and it may be expressed in many different ways. Their driving force is their brain, and it is fundamental to everything about them.

Here is a list of characteristics of gifted kids, though it’s important to note that not all characteristics will apply to your child. So look instead for a “pattern.”

Precocious:  Clearly advanced development in a particular area is, abilities are noticeably ahead of peers the same age.

Intense interests:  In reading, people, music, etc. some realm of activity (not forced, it springs from kids naturally).

Extremely curious:  Interest in experimenting and doing thing differently, limitless supply of questions, vivid imagination

Long attention span:  Intense concentration or focused on single task for long duration; high level of energy

Very sensitive:  Intense in feelings, behavior and views

Divergent thinker and excellent reasoning:  Tendency to put ideas of things together in ways that are unusual and not obvious; elaborate and original thinking; excellent problem solving skills.

Learns quickly:  Doesn’t need repetition, practice, pushed or skill and drill

Excellent memory:  Retains a great deal of information

Extensive vocabulary:  Unusually large vocabularies for age; great comprehension and subtleties of language “get it” faster

To be identified “gifted,” the child usually is given a standard individual IQ test by a certified psychologist and be administered face-to-face (not online). That test is given without charge by a school district or a parent may pay to have it administered by any certified psychologist in your community. An IQ score of 132 is usually used as a cut-off score for gifted. In addition to the IQ test, the school may deem a child as gifted through teacher recommendation, achievement scores, or identified talent in a particular area (such as math or music). Since IQ tests are not considered valid for children younger than four or five (and ideally are given by nine years of age) you should at least wait until your child enters school.

Michele answers specific questions about gifted children:

1. Are we pushing too hard?
2. Should she go to public or private school?
3. Should I even bother labeling my child as gifted?
4. Why are parents embarrassed of having smart kids?
5. How can I boost my child's academic confidence?

Do you have any questions or tips of your own?  Leave a comment below.

Dr. Michele Borba is the author of over 22 books including 12 Simple Secrets Real Moms Know .

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Each week Michele Borba answers your parenting questions right here on her blog. If you have a parenting problem or question leave a comment on this post and you may have yours answered next week!

My daughter is almost three and has an incredible ear for music. She sings beautifully and recognizes songs after hearing them just once. She can also identify the same singer of different songs when she listens to the radio. We try to expose her to all kinds of music, and it makes sense to try to get as many instruments into our home, so we're working on that too. My questions: how best to develop this gift? And how to utilize her love of music to enhance her life in other ways too?  --Anne


You have yourself a budding Mozart, eh? The best thing here is that you have identified your child's musical passion and gift. And because you have you can guide but not push her interest. That gift must be gently "drawn out."  Luckily there is wonderful research by Benjamin Bloom who followed over 120 highly talented kids (music, art, science, athletics, etc) to find out what if anything helped nurture those talents. Some of those kids went on to win Pulitzer prizes, and even Olympic gold medals. Here are the key findings you might use:

1. Identify the child's NATURAL talent. Not one you hope she has, but one she actually does

2. Find fun, natural ways to nurture the talent. No skill and drill stuff. No flash cards. Fun experiences. A trip to the museum, instruments to make and play, listening to classical music, watching and reading about composers.

3. Find a "connecting" teacher. The first teacher or mentor always nurtured, not pushed, the talent. She instilled a love of the talent so the child was motivated to want to pursue the talent on her own

4. Go with your child's lead. Challenge, accelerate and guide only as you see that interest.

Only later (middle school on) was a stricter coach or more regimented teacher hired. But by then the child was so in love with the talent the parent couldn't stop the kid if she wanted to. (Think of some of those stories about Olympic athletes in Beijing. Michael Phelp's mom exemplified Bloom's research to the T.)

While a child may have the talent, research clearly show the right support of a parent is what helps him or her soar (or fail).

Click here to read more of Michele Borba's Q&As, or leave a comment below with your own questions and it may be answered next week.

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Related Content:

• Is my child gifted?

Dr. Michele Borba is the author of over 22 books including 12 Simple Secrets Real Moms Know .

What exactly makes a “gifted” child? The definition of gifted continues to be hotly debated. To date, there is no single agreed-upon definition. What is agreed is that high intelligence exists and it may be expressed in many different ways. Gifted children include persons from all ethnic groups and lifestyles and not merely “privileged environments.”

Watch the segment from TODAY Parents are usually the first to recognize a child’s giftedness quite early. Truly gifted kids are different. Their driving force is their brain—and it is fundamental to everything about them.

Typically, to be identified as “gifted” by a school district, the child must be given an individual IQ test by a certified psychologist. The child may be gifted in only certain areas (language or verbal abilities or music), or exceptional in math but not in language.

IQ tests generally have the following criteria:

1. An IQ test measures potential broadly and some ability areas specifically
2. An achievement test that measures what the child expresses he has learned so far
3. An IQ score of 130 is usually used as a cut-off score for gifted. A gifted child typically has mental abilities in the upper 2.5 to 3 percent of the population

One principle is true for all kids regardless of IQ: Children thrive best in educational environments that are tailored to their needs. Gifted kids are gifted for life, so they will have similar academic needs throughout their schooling. It seems to makes no difference if the school is private or public as long as it has these key elements suggested by Carol Bainbridge:

• Gifted philosophy. The staff understands gifted children and their needs, is regularly trained in gifted education and has a clear plan to help each child reach his potential.


• Acceleration & enrichment. A challenging curriculum that stretches the child’s mind (and is still based on realistic expectations).


• Multiple options & flexibility. The curriculum should be flexible to fit the child’s academic needs and provide the opportunity for the child to study a topic in depth.


• Sound identification process. How does the school identify gifted children? Ideally the process should not be based on just one test score but also take into consideration teacher recommendations and clearly talented and exceptional children.


• Matches your child’s needs. Can you see your child in this setting? Would he be comfortable and get along with the other kids and this teacher? Is there a guidance component to help your child “fit” in or handle his perfectionist tendencies and highly sensitive traits?

The topic of "gifted children" sure hit a cord with many of you. My email box is loaded with questions. I'll try to answer as many of your questions as possible here on my blog. Read through some of these questions, and feel free to leave one of your own for the future.

Both my husband and I were in gifted programs in school and our 2 year old is already showing signs of being gifted as well. She can spell her first name, count to 10, identify colors and shapes and sort by multiple criteria such as "Show me the three yellow stars" or "8 red circles". We don't push her but we don't want her to waste this gift either. How do we know when to back off and when to proceed?  --Erika

The topic of "gifted children" sure hit a cord with many of you. My email box is loaded with questions. I'll try to answer as many of your questions as possible here on my blog. Read through some of these questions, and feel free to leave one of your own for the future.

My child attends a Montessori school (3yrs old) and I know that she is gifted. They just started a primary school and asked that I keep her in the program instead of going to public school and I am wondering which do you think would help her. Socially she is doing great, but she is a little sensitive. I just want her to be in the best place to encourage her to learn. --Dana

The topic of "gifted children" sure hit a cord with many of you. My email box is loaded with questions. I'll try to answer as many of your questions as possible here on my blog. Read through some of these questions, and feel free to leave one of your own for the future.

Are there any benefits of testing? I am not sold on what it will add to her besides a label. --Dana

The topic of "gifted children" sure hit a cord with many of you. My email box is loaded with questions. I'll try to answer as many of your questions as possible here on my blog. Read through some of these questions, and feel free to leave one of your own for the future.

Why is it that parents are always so proud of their child's accomplishments in sports and will push them to, or even past, their limits, but so many parents are embarrassed about having kids who are smart? --Wendy Rakus

The topic of "gifted children" sure hit a cord with many of you. My email box is loaded with questions. I'll try to answer as many of your questions as possible here on my blog. Read through some of these questions, and feel free to leave one of your own for the future.

My son has been nominated to participate in the gifted program the last two years, but his lack of self confidence holds him back from being accepted. Is there a way to boost his self confidence? --Laura