Americans spend $60 billion a year on diets, pills and programs in the hope they will shed those unwanted pounds. Chances are, most people on any one of those diets are parents. What you may not realize is that secrets of effective diets also apply to effective parenting.

Those same proven methods that help drop pounds also can be used to make a happier family and change annoying kid behaviors. Parents already know these strategies, so now they just need to apply them to their family.

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Choose a Plan That Fits Your Lifestyle
Just like in dieting, if you don't choose the right plan you'll fall off track. Effective parenting, like dieting, is always tailored to your child. Before you make any progress, just like anything else, you have to know thy child and know thyself with this one.

A good plan is always fueled by a strong reason as to why you should change, and how doing so will help your child and your family. It keeps you motivated. One trick is to push the fast-forward button and look ahead. If you don't create a plan for change what is the long-term outcome for your child?


Announce Your Intentions
Announcing your intentions is a strategy proven to actually help you stick to your plan. Researchers found that when people announce what they plan to change, they follow through more, since the last thing they want to be seen as is a hypocrite. So tell your best friend, spouse, child's teacher or your kid your parenting intentions. Always preach what you plan to practice. The guilt of not sticking to your plan can be deadly.

Regularly tracking progress increases motivation. You'll see successes that you may have overlooked and that proof pushes you to keep going. The trick is to find a simple way to track your plan, like electronically or in a journal. You'll then be able to review and see what's working and what's not. That way you can refine your response.


Eliminate One "Problem Area" at a Time
Only target one behavior at a time to change. Your chances of success are higher because you'll be able to better focus your efforts. One tip is to "chunk" the change into smaller manageable parts. You may want to stop your kid from being so rude: "This week Kevin will say thank you. Next week: please. The following week: excuse me." Little steps can make big differences.


Find Support in Others
It's much easier to succeed when you have others cheering you on. The best person is your partner or spouse, but your best friends can also help. You could also find an online support group or form a mommy group. Change is more likely if you have a support system to talk to about your successes or setbacks.

You need someone who encourages you to keep on, understands where you're coming from and is unconditionally supportive. This person is your personal cheerleader and that personality type helps you succeed. Leaning on someone that is too critical is a setup for failure. The person is like a gentle nag partner to keep you on course when you sway or help you troubleshoot a problem when the going gets tough.


Stick to the Plan
Any lifestyle change generally takes at least 21 days to come to fruition, but it will be different for each parent and child. Just beware of the "behavior backslide": Just when you thought you curbed that annoying behavior, you may see a sudden increase. It's common and is a sign to hang in there a little longer. A big mistake is giving up too soon.


Remember to celebrate those little successes and kid efforts along the way. Above all, don't give up!

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Dr. Michele Borba is the author of over 22 books including 12 Simple Secrets Real Moms Know